Dear Creators of "The New Girl", Full disclosure, I have never really liked that vegan-cotton-wearing-hipster songstress, Ms. Deschanel. Her eyes are too big. And her bangs are too perfect. Don't get me wrong, "Elf" is my favorite Christmas movie, and that singing in the shower scene is hilarious. And I liked "500 Days of Summer" but I really wanted cutie-pie Joseph Gordon-Levitt to dump that bitch on Day 3.

 (She's like an early version of Lana Del Rey (substitute  ZD's blue eyes for LDR's fake lips))

                                                                (See what I mean?)

 Anywhoozies, I had very low expectations for "The New Girl", but I felt compelled to watch it. I think I still had some wine left in my glass  was too cozy and comfortable to get up and do the dishes, or something like that.

And here is my confession: I love "The New Girl". I love Zooey Deschanel and the fact that she wears tights with shorts and I like her really low voice (but I stand firm in my belief that all not of that hair on her head is hers. Girls gotta have some mad extensions). You had me at the very first episode! You did. And I don't know how you did it!??!?!?  Is it HER? Or is it  the guys on the show that make it worth watching?  Is it  a combination of all of them?  The writing is fantastic. I want to move into their loft and drink hand-crafted hipster beers and talk about what it is like to be in my late 20s, with my late 20s problems like stupid boyfriends and mean girls and knit toys for my kittens.

And you have featured some of the best cameo guests?!?!? Jason Stackhouse and his dead girlfriend Amy have done left Bon Temps, Louisiana to go hang out with Jess! And Drew Barrymore's ex-boyfriend from the Dell commercials! And Dodger from China Beach! And Dermot Mulroney!

So, any way. I am writing you to see if Boyfriend, Spanky and Yours Truly can be written into in one fun little episode, We don't need much. Maybe 2 lines. We can be neighbors next door, and have our own loft. Or we can be parents to a student in Miss Day's classroom, or...maybe not, we would screw up being fake parents....But we could be patrons in Nick's Bar! We are good at drinking in BARS!

Please let me know if we can make it on the show sometime soon and we will book our vacays and head out that way.

And I ain't real mad at y'all for switching Coach to Winston after "The New Girl" pilot. I was at first, but I'm cool.

Thanks for making me laugh until my mascara runs down my face. Thanks for making Boyfriend laugh at me laughing at the TV. I have fallen off the couch, btw.

 Thank you for your consideration!
 G

 PS: Did you know that the show was only 30 minutes long? I thought it was an hour! Can you make it an hour? Please? I just love her to pieces, I do!